Philosophy

I've gone though a bit of a philosophical metamorphosis in the past couple of years. I was always raised agnostic with fairly standard liberal values. As I went into High School, I had been going to  a youth group fairly regularly, and while I was still pretty damn agnostic with regards to the existence of any given deity, I had begun to grow lazy with my answers to my own questions regarding why things are the way they are, that is to say, I would answer myself with things like, "Well maybe god just wants it that way.", and such, which is lazy by anybody's standards, I should think. As I continued my journey through High School, I began to study philosophies in my English classes. Eventually my interest was piqued (I think by The Metamorphosis, and then later The Stranger), and I studied up on the various philosophical schools of thought. I went through an existential phase (first deistic, then atheistic), absurdist, deist, and finally arrived at nihilism. I am a nihilist and have been for about a two years now. Put simply, I don't believe that anything matters in any sort of intrinsic way, nor do I believe that humans can create meaning. I'm not saying that they don't try, but no matter what you think of reality, it doesn't change what it actually is or the fact that any idea of value is entirely man-made. The universe has existed for 13.6 billion years, yet all of a sudden, in the last 0.00001% of it's existence, this arrogant group of beings has decided that they somehow have the power to create and impose meaning onto reality. Ridiculous. I'm not saying that I don't have things that I personally value, but it's important (and to me, comforting) to remember that in the grand scheme of things, absolutely nothing is important. Having a bad day? Don't worry, it doesn't matter. Life will go on until it doesn't. There's nothing any of us can really do about it, and maybe that's for the best. I don't know about you, but I certainly wouldn't want that sort of power.